Half way home!

July 1, 2015

We’re half way there! It’s Canada Day today, and there’s 17 days left to our time apart.

The last week has been busy, with E. arriving in town, A.’s birthday celebration, the ScotiaHalf, dinner with some new friends, packing for Victoria, and my dreaded assignments keeping me preoccupied.

Amidst all this, we have managed to connect at least briefly most early mornings (night time for him) and most late evenings (morning for him).  The conversations aren’t always long or free-flowing; many times it is frustrating on both ends because of the weak and disrupted signals.  But, we try.  And that’s what’s important to me.  I try to keep my mind focused on the positives: we still share our gratitude lists everyday, he wished me luck the morning of the half, he tells me stories about highlights in his day, unexpected phone calls, ‘i love you darling’s, his trying to arrange company for me, and reassurances that I’ve been doing a good job managing my anxieties about being apart.

I don’t let myself dwell on my concerns for too long.  I used to.  But I won’t anymore.  I have accepted that his career decisions might not always leave me in an ideal situation–that I might have less of him than I would’ve liked and our experiences may not resemble what I had hoped for all the time.  But I am seeing now that worrying about this will not change anything and I have to play with the cards that I am dealt. The difference between now and then is – I feel more confident that I will play these cards well, regardless of what the hand is. I will adapt.  I will learn.  I will grow.  And I will thrive.

All I can do is prepare myself – to be healthy and strong enough, mentally and physically, to be able to do these things when the time comes.

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